"I have held many things in my hands, and I have lost them all; but whatever I have placed in God's hands, that I still possess." -Martin Luther

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Foot Jiggling VI: A few special classes

Super-twiner: Begin with the stylish cross. Then, pass the top foot underneath the back of the bottom leg. This excruciating position allows little motion, but sometimes helps to strech the muscles during long car trips, and the author believes it would be highly effective if utilized by girls to express uncontainable happiness...so long as they could get their legs untangled.
Typing Off the Bow: My sister Hope discovered this secular jiggle position. Thank you, Hope! First, sit at a desk with a keyboard. Then, Raise one leg and place it on the desk somewhere behind and to one side of the keyboard. Raise the other leg so that it passes between the two typing arms. If it is the right/left leg, it should touch, but not apply pressure to, the inside of the right/left forearm. Place this leg atop the other. Jiggling the bottom leg in this position is almost impossible. However, jiggling from the ankle on the other one may very well cause the entire desk to shake unnerving all in the near vicinity. Plus, typing around your legs just looks cool.
Indian style: This jiggle pattern requires a large flat surface, probably a floor, to sit on. Cross your legs indian-style, a jiggle from the hips with your knees. Drumming on thighs and calves is also effective. A very relaxed, jiggle-and forget position.
This concludes this sobering topic. Foot jiggling is not for the faint of heart, but it's benefits are many, including stimulated cardio rates, muscle exercise and relaxation, meditative concentration, and frustration of enemies.

Not legal in all states. Foot Jiggle at your own risk. Surgeon General's warning: Foot Jiggling may cause severe brain, heart, nervous system, and/or ligament damage. Do not foot jiggle if you are on any doctor prescribed medication, have any history of heart or mental problems, or are pregnant.
Keep away from children.

3 comments:

  1. Joben what the heck, my blog is so much better than yours. You make me sound like the human pretzel or something. I don't think anyone would be able to picture what you described, it sounds like I'm sprawled all over the computer desk without any hope of ever untangling myself again.
    Did you get the double twist thing from me too? You know I do that! And what the HECK do you mean by girls expressing hapiness by that, that makes NO sense.

    Much love
    your ever-supportive sister (kinda like a running shoe!!)

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  2. I figured out what he was talking about, Hope (on THIS one, at least). It really does look neat.
    Super twiner is not excruciating. I do it all the time. It's very helpful when your top leg keeps sliding off your bottom leg in Stylish cross. The girls expressing happiness by it IS strange, though. If you're trying to be extremely smart and understanding by that, I'm afraid it didn't work. Oh, well, it certainly made me laugh!

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  3. Finally, someone who speaks my language...love you Claire! And only act like me when you want to get ~confused stares~

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